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[TXT] Maybe it's time for 'MAYBEBOL'
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Titel: [TXT] Maybe it's time for 'MAYBEBOL'
Verfasst am: Di, 02 Okt 2007, 21:39
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Datei: 16.12.1993

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                       MAYBE IT'S TIME FOR 'MAYBEBOL'

     ENTROPY:
          The amount by which a system differs from its ideal state.

     The Second Law of Thermodynamics can be interpreted as saying "Entropy
always increases with time".  This means that as soon as a perfect system is
achieved, it starts to deteriorate.  This may be understandable in mechanical
systems where moving parts are subject to wear and tear.  But, what is not so
evident is the concept of entropy applies to logical, or software systems
also.

     It is no secret that 60% to 80% of every programming dollar is spent on
combatting entropy -- that is, maintaining existing systems.  If you are
involved with any commercial systems, think of how often programmers have to
code changes upon changes to that "ideal" system.  Why is this always the
case?  Is there any way to get around this problem?

     Let's examine the situation.  Many times the people requesting a new
computer system (the users) cannot define their needs precisely.  Often they
are not sure what they want or how to deal with certain situations. Many
ambiguous features are left in systems with the idea  "We'll deal with that
problem when we get to it".

     Programs and programming languages require exact and unambiguous
definitions to function effectively: solving an unknown or ambiguous problem
is next to impossible with todays programming languages.

     As I see it, there are two possible solutions to this problem :

          Solution #1:  Carefully and objectively resolve the system design to
achieve an exact problem definition.

          Response:  Who are you kidding?  Face it, people have been trying to
do this since day one and no one has succeeded yet.  Every time they get
close, entropy sets in.

          Solution #2:  Change the programming langauage.

     Why not?  We're trying to use rigidly defined programming langauages
structured along exact lines to provide predictable and consistant results.
This obviously does not reflect real-life applications at all.  To handle
modern complex situations, a more flexable langauage is needed -- a langauage
with the ability to procrastinate and deliver the silicon equivalent of a
shrug.

     After much research, deep thought and trial and error, I have come up
with the outline of an innovative programming language which I call the
Multiply Analytic Yet Basically Evasive Bull... Oriented Language, or
M.A.Y.B.E.B.O.L.

     The following are some of M.A.Y.B.E.B.O.L.'s more attractive features...


      1)  IF ... THEN ... MAYBE:
          An eloquent concrete admission of indecision.  This statement is
     the heart and soul of MAYBEBOL.

      2)  DO SOMETHING:
          When those un-foreseen situations occur; the user is on sabbatical
     in Africa and the project is due tomorrow, the DO SOMETHING statement
     just might help you hit the deadline.
          Example: IF ADD-CHG-DEL-CODE = "PIZZA" THEN DO SOMETHING.
          Ideally, no one should have any idea just what might be done.
     (Some more adventurous souls may wish to set up a pool and bet on the
     outcome).

      3)  GO SOMEWHERE:
          Where?  I don't know, do you?

      4)  ON ERROR conditions:
          The ON ERROR statement has two possible formats:

          1)  ON ERROR GENERATE EXCUSE:
                Everyone knows excuses are more important than results.

          2)  ON ERROR FORGET ABOUT IT:
                Self explanatory.

     In each of the ON ERROR conditions, control will be returned to the main
program by means of the GO SOMEWHERE statement.

      5)  GENERATE X REPORTS:
          X is an integer from 1 to 32.  Users always demand reports.  They
take these reports and place them carefully in multicolored binders.  These
binders are then stacked on a shelf, giving the users a place to store their
dust collections.  Since no one ever looks at these reports, a great deal of
time and effort can be saved by generating them randomly.

      6)  COIN:
          A bulit-in subroutine.  COIN will return a character value of
"HEADS" or "TAILS".  This can be very useful when making decisions.

      7)  GUESS:
          The programmer doesn't know what to do, the user doesn't know what
to do, nobody knows what to do, so why not?

      8)  PRETEND:
          As in "IF BAD-DATA THEN PRETEND".

      9)  SEARCH (table-name):
          The SEARCH statement will consecutively search a table in memory.
Note that it is illegal to supply what to search for.  If somehow a match is
found, set the ERROR condition (see ON ERROR).

     10)  LOOP FOREVER:
           A great time saver for the programmer.  Instead of having to
subconsciously invent subtle and hard-to-find infinite loops, he may now
declare them explicitly.

     11)  DIVIDE x BY ZERO:
           Same concept as LOOP FOREVER.


     The above statement and philosophy will be the basis for MAYBEBOL.  As
time permits, I will attempt to complete the language design.  This task
should be much easier to accomplish than it may appear.  When done it will be
available to all.

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